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How do you keep your SO happy?
Last Post 02/05/2015 01:08 PM by Tom Morrison. 17 Replies.
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SideBySide

Posts:427

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02/03/2015 12:59 PM
I suspect my wife is getting a little frustrated at how much time I spend on the bike, and that is amount is only going to go up as I get in better shape.  I'd cut back to prevent risking my marriage, but would rather not.   It worked better last summer when we could meet up for a ride to dinner and drinks after work, and my longer ride, but she has no interest in riding in the winter. 

I think I need to do a better job telling her when I will be home too.  I was feeling good last night, so kept riding.  Dinner was made and sitting when I go home. 

Anyone have any suggestions?


longslowdistance

Posts:1472

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02/03/2015 01:47 PM
Coming home safe and in a good mood has worked for me.
Orange Crush

Posts:1995

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02/03/2015 01:59 PM
36hrs work week. I ride 4hrs Friday mornings and rest of the day "work from home". That leaves weekend for family. This renders the training rides a bit expensive though :-)

My wife's getting a little frustrated with the time I spent on exectutive of youth soccer club, which is almost like a second job, probably 8-16 hrs weekly of keeping things running and organized. I manage that part by doing as much as possible of that during work hrs, shhh.
SideBySide

Posts:427

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02/03/2015 02:19 PM
She is always worried about my safety. I have agreed to everything, thus the arrival time note. I use a flag, I am lit up like the 4th of July, and try to let her know when I'll be home. I have been able to stick with roads that have a bike lane, although that scares her. She'd be happy if I never left separated trails, but that would be too boring. I may get tracking software for the phone so she can see that I am moving and where I am. I went for a ride with a friend, on trails only, and wore a black jacket. She saw the difference in our gear with his red jacket and suggested I buy a new jacket so I would be more visible.

I think she does understand how much riding means to me.
ChinookPass

Posts:809

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02/03/2015 02:55 PM
Only thing I ever learned in marriage counseling: it's not your job to make your SO happy.

life is short, as long as you keep a balance between family, work, hobbies, you are holding up your end of the bargain. Everyone else can learn to cope on their own terms.
zootracer

Posts:567

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02/03/2015 03:54 PM
Old married man here (48 years). My wife likes me to get away as much as possible...but she's gone a lot also..we just work it out....
SideBySide

Posts:427

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02/03/2015 03:58 PM
We've only been married for two years, so I am still figuring it out.
KootnaMoots

Posts:47

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02/03/2015 07:54 PM
82 years in March, 60 years of marriage in June my wife encourages me to ride and get out of the house. So I call a bud and go ride, not as hard as I useta, not as fast as I useta , not as long as I useta, but
the wife is happy and I was riding where I might have found something worthless to do. A meal after the ride in town keeps her from doing dishes and me from drying.
Dale

Posts:925

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02/03/2015 08:06 PM
Plan on a two hour ride, know it will be three, tell her you'll be home in four.


longslowdistance

Posts:1472

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02/03/2015 08:25 PM
KM, respect to you and yours. 62 years, wow. An inspiration.
Oldfart

Posts:511

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02/04/2015 01:00 AM
We met almost thirty years ago at a bike race. She was a downhill ski racer riding and bike racing for training. I was a cat three punter. I ride alone all the time off road and road. I call if I'm going to be late so she doesn't worry. I tell her where I'm going and how long I'll be.
THE SKINNY

Posts:506

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02/04/2015 08:09 AM
they say communication is the secret. good luck with that.
How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.
Master50

Posts:332

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02/04/2015 08:36 AM
I met my wife at a bike race in 1989 and we are still riding together.
vtguy

Posts:298

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02/04/2015 10:58 AM
I get up at 4 am so I can ride a couple of hours before work -- I leave a note saying where I'm going and when I'll be back and take a phone along. When I'm home from work, it's completely family time. I also do the grocery shopping, about half the laundry and most of the cooking.
Yo Mike

Posts:338

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02/04/2015 02:13 PM
Like SideBySide, I've been married for a relatively short time, but I do keep the addage 'happy wife, happy life' in the back of my head.

Bringing her coffee in bed just about every morning helps!

Been so busy with family and houses this past year, that she was actually happy those few times I went for a ride. I do bring my cell with me, but advising her of my entire route is impractical, and it may in fact change mid-ride, for all the usual 'reasons' - or no reason at all.

That said, I HATE taking or making calls on a ride. I look at rides as a mini-vacation, and dislike even having to be back at a certain time.

"A meal after the ride in town keeps her from doing dishes and me from drying." THAT sounds like a winning formula, KM, thanks!
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